I’m Thinking Of Ending Things

Go ahead. Unfriend me. Tell me you’ll never take my advice again. Because here is the most marmite of films of the year. Full on marmite-cinema. A movie that those who love it, REALLY love it. And those who hate it, want to travel back in time to undo the experience and never have it implanted into their memories in the first place. But a movie so full of questions and mystery, I could not let it run through my conscience without being totally gripped and haunted by it.

The Netflix exclusive I’m Thinking Of Ending Things is written and directed by cult indie master Charlie Kaufman, whose genius is evident in previous works he had written: Being John Malkovich, Adaptation, and Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind for which he won an Oscar. His directorial debut came with the Philip Seymour Hoffman starring Synecdoche, New York, a lamentation on life’s struggles to find connection, place, and meaning in life. …Ending Things is also a meditation on life, love and regret, though it is less obviously so at first.

A Young Woman (only ever named as such) is picked up by her boyfriend who drives them to his family home, a secluded farm, to meet his parents – a big moment in any relationship. She is however having doubts about the relationship and is therefore thinking of ending it, though she can’t quite find the strength of conviction.

After a long car ride full of banter, they arrive at the farmhouse, where things get, um… awkward at first, and then very weird. And I’ll leave it at that.

Admittedly during the first act of the film my attention had drifted and I wondered what it was I was watching; and why. The scenes so heavily laden with back-and-forth dialogue, less Sorkin-esque wit and more James Joyce stream-of-consciousness, the introduction to the characters can appear cold and impersonal. Which can be uncomfortable considering we’re stuck in a car with them in the middle of a snowy winter’s day. Suddenly something happened that had me hooked (am not mentioning specifics as this is completely spoiler-free), and I found myself whole-heartedly engaged.

The weirdness gradually turns into an eeriness that I could not detach myself from. I had to keep watching. I wanted to know where the rabbit hole goes.

The film brilliantly applies cinema trickery to evoke a vivid sense of detachment in the character’s experience. Editing and sound design techniques are used to full cinematic effect to create a world beyond the material whilst lead actress Jesse Plemons’ voice-over guides us through her character’s thoughts and musings.

Nothing here is random, not a single word of dialogue, not a cut in the edit, not a prop, not a sound. Even amongst a pile of books and DVDs, there are clues. Every single item, every move, every breath has a purpose, and is all connected. The other narratively confusing big release film of 2020 is Christopher Nolan’s Tenet, in which, if one were to begin dissecting the creative and technical decisions, one would find all the pieces of the puzzle are there for a reason and they all fit for the plot to justify itself. In …Ending Things, though the same applies, it doesn’t mean everyone would understand the same narrative. It wouldn’t all make sense to everyone for the same reasons. The film touches on such personal and intimate themes that forever will audiences’ interpreting meaning, rhyme and reason be a debate based on what each individual brings with them.

It is a masterclass of creation for every detail to hold weight or connect to some other detail in the narrative or design, in turn connected to the thoughts and emotions of the protagonists (and antagonists). The atmosphere is one of a human darkness. Though it takes time to make sense of the aforementioned weirdness, by the end of the film, what is going on does come through. Even with only the most subtle understanding, or perhaps because of it, the movie left me floating in a cloud of mystery, otherworldliness, for several days.

When it ended and the credits rolled, I sat completely frozen, the only word I was able to pronounce was “What?” repeatedly. The only other time I felt so shaken and baffled was after seeing David Lynch’s Mulholland Drive. Which is also about mystery, dreams, regret, and the forever-unanswered question of “what if?”. I was gripped by it for days.

“I’m thinking of ending things” – what a great title to mark the end of a shitty year. We can certainly put 2020 to an end. But what do we do of the damage it’s left behind? All experiences leave a mark, and at some point, whether not tomorrow or next year, they might return to replay in our minds, to haunt us, for us to reimagine and contemplate. Though with the inevitability of all our fates we may feel powerless, in our power is to make this very moment count, to focus as much as possible on the present, and not live a life of fear.